Come home~

The beeping sound woke me up and I saw my eldest son by my side, taking care of my body dumps as I was already weak. I breathed heavily through the tubes I found inserted into my lungs from my nostrils and my mouth. With just a slight turn, I took a glance to my right where the Vital signs monitor was.

“You’re getting more stable, pa.”
I felt a sudden urge to stand up. With all my might, pulled the handle bars by the gurney, I sat up and pulled out the tubes but before I was successful, all the nurses were summoned to my side and I had my hands tied to the gurney.

“Pa, relax. When you are well, I’ll take you to Pulau Langkawi, and all the places that you’ve taken us to. We’ll also go to China to visit Alex.” Said Andy, his eyes watered.

I nodded.

I had a wife and four kids. For the last 40 years, I had been fighting against a severe depression that has befallen on my beloved wife. It was a tough battle, but thank god, my kids grew up completely normal and undamaged. I believe for everything I want, there is a price to pay. For that, I didn’t mind being hated by my wife, being thrown out of the house homeless and have nothing at last.

Over years of roaming around, there I was, on a gurney because of a severe pulmonary edema. I have no hard feelings on anything to be honest, for I have raised my kids successfully no matter how tough. Thinking of it alone makes me feel good. I mean, who could do that? Raising kids alongside an aggressive depressed mom. If anyone would, try it *wink*. Well, My wife had been angry with me ever since 40 years ago, but who cares, I tried to love her, and I still do.
Finally it was already time for me to sleep, as I heard a nurse, while putting off the light, said, “Uncle, dah masa untuk tidur ya. (It’s time to sleep)”

I reached out to my eldest son and daughter’s hands, held them tight on my chest. It felt good, seeing them grown up. This feeling is something that money could never buy. Now there’s one thing that I need to remind all these kids, “Forgive, and love your mom”

They nodded and I dozed off … Strangely, not long after… I was pretty sure I felt the hand of my wife on my chest and heard “Ah Tek..” (Hey, that was my name)
  
I woke up, feeling dizzy and just then I remembered I slept too late the night before, completing my lesson plans and scheme of work. Out of all nights, my brain just had to pick a night when I slept late to give me an odd dream like this. “That was funny huh?” I told myself. It was a warm winter in North China, and I had a strong feeling that it wouldn’t snow this year. I showered and got ready for work. Once I stepped out … I immediately felt the chilling sensation on my cheeks and I looked up into the grey sky. It snowed.

As I was drowned in pleasure of the snow, my phone beeped. I swiped it open, it was my sis sent me a picture. Opened it up, was a heart rate monitor… a straight line…
“Wtf…” I replied

beeped…

“Dad went away peacefully in his sleep… the last word he heard was mom saying ‘Ah Tek.. Come home with me’”

REST IN PEACE~ YOUR SWEET MEMORY WILL ALWAYS BE IN OUR HEART AND MIND

Wandered 10,585 Days

So on my 26th year, after years and years of studying and the struggle between financing myself, maintaining my graduation metric, and my shattered love life, I was hired into a job overseas. Gotten my VISA, immediately I packed my luggage overnight not knowing what beholds of the future. Surely, my head tried to advice me to think it through before going, but I trusted my heart which said "That's your future." Having nothing to lose, off I flew, to the middle kingdom which I was hoping to find a new start.

I spent the whole of two years, 730 days in the new world without anything more exciting than going around places alone. Little did I find that at this age, to find someone that truly goes all out loving me, or vice versa is virtually close to impossible. At least that's what I thought until one night, I was bored and decided to wander down the street to see what I can find in the store, but instead I found a girl that I never imagined I would be together with.

Never have I thought that it would be possible, but time and action proves that it is.


On my 29th birthday, I was brought to a nice restaurant. Didn't know what was happening, I pushed the door open. There I saw balloons, which every one blown by the very breaths she exhaled, decorated carefully on the wall, candles she bought and arranged by her very own hands, and flowers she had carefully chosen hoping to give a big surprise to the one that she cares.


I've always been the kind that doesn't invest in much feelings, little did I realize that I have always been too scared to love. I have always been afraid of losing emotionally to someone, that I love and at the end I don't get the equal amount of feelings that I have invested.

She is the total opposite of me. She taught me love, giving unconditionally, and passion for love again. I did not know what to say or how to react that night when I entered the restaurant, with all the props, decoration, candles she did herself. I was just... moved. Never in my life had anyone ever done that, never in my life had anyone ever taught me how to love and I have finally found it, after 10585 days of wandering on the earth.


After 10,585 days, I've found you :) <3 

 

PEEKAY~ "Kind of Spoiler"

Came across this movie named Peekay and it is one not to be missed. Plots are well planned and organized and the characters' internalizations were good. It's not like any other conventional movies which just focuses on the advanced technical, graphic, or sound effects but this movie is purely attractive in every aspects of moderation.

I'll share some of why I would say so...

Firstly, I would like to confess personally that I am quite particular when it comes to picking movies that I would even entertain. Same like guys who goes for ugly duckling instead of a barbie doll (PLEASE DOUBLE CONFIRM WITH YOUR MIRROR BEFORE YOU CURSE MY WORDS, IF YOU HAVE DONE IT FEEL FREE TO CURSE IT), what I always seek in a movie was the core concept that it brings to its audiences instead of the amazing visual effects (of course it matters, indirectly) and nerve gripping plots (it's important, though). But this PEEKAY have just its own message to tell.

It brings audiences' attention into realization of its entire concept, bringing out the picture of how is religion perceived and practised in India through very comical representation. An Alien who came to earth naked and lost his key to a thief, went around searching for it but only to have everybody telling him that the only one who could help him is GOD. Believing that GOD was some person searchable and fathomable, there starts his journey in search for GOD.

                      

He was called Peekay (Drunkard) by everybody because he went around searching for GOD in every religion's GOD's house, breaking every rules that the religion has unintentionally. Of course his search ended in vain, and guess what, he has his own unique way to find GOD with his own out of norm ideas. Of course he would need some money to carry out his tasks too, and yeah, he has his own weird ways of raising funds i.e, stealing money from dancing cars parked at secluded riverside (you make your own imagination, hehe)

It is not like any conventional movies which has some serious, strong taste concepts which has insertion of comic relief. But PEEKAY has definitely made me realize that it could be the other way round by having the core concept as a relief to the initial impression in the beginning of the movie that it is just another senseless comedy.

If you would like to watch a movie which challenges the notion of blind belief, superstitious practise and distorted brainwashing, this is something that you should not miss. This movie challenges a lot of blind practises that we have not even realized it ourselves, of course, through PEEKAY who is as innocent as a child to ask the most fundamental, simple, but hard to answer questions to the religious masters.

Sincerely,

Man Of ImpPosSibiLitiEs

Education

Just a mere observation about two contrasting situations:

Poor: talented and ends up in the wrong career path
Rich: talented and ends up in the right career path

Poor: not talented, ends up merely surviving in society
Rich: not talented, takes holiday in university luxuriously

We do understand that education is inevitably important to everyone nowadays. To as far as we are concerned, where there is basic needs there's a gold mine. 

Yeap that's right, with money, all of your major concerns about your education paths are basically cleared off.
You don't need to worry about what would be the outcome either, because if you do not suit the course, you could just change to another University, and you don't even have to worry about the hostels and the fact that you will be sharing rooms too. You will stay in a decent condominium with beautiful sky view where even Rapunzel's hair could not touch the bottom.

For those who's in lower hierarchy.. I'm sorry this course costs RM17 thousand per semester.

oklah... become foreman also good la

Man of ImPoSsiBiliTieS

Old Age in Drain

Lately I've been listening to some of the hot topics which people, specially the group of elites which call themselves oldies of the 80's nagging about how drastic the world is falling into the hands of after 90's who only looks down at the floor. The old pattern way of communication is not appreciated anymore, but rather they would switch their attention to their android and Iphone. But it isn't that bad to jeopardize humanity like what they said, from a non-sided view point.

I guess I'll tell you what I think

Just came across an article about an old man who had just finished buying his goods, walking home while it rained cats and dogs. A huge tree fell on him and soon everybody gathered around him to snap picture of him hugging the tree. The old man instantly became famous with people twitting him in twitter, facebook posts and some uploaded video on the youtube on the spot with their android phones. He dies soon after that. He was also on the instagram with hashtags

#oldman#treefell#helpless#omg#somebodyhelp#sad#cry#GBH

They sure are creative man...

Okay, I thought that the basic of humanity is subjective so it is not just words or what ever it is for display. There has been a lot of researches done on the vulnerability of that notion with the existence of technology, claiming that gadgets like android would project human nature (compasion, etc) into mechanistic form and thus dehumanization (denial of human nature). I would say that's nothing more like a reason for them to deny themselves of the absence of guts and compassion, when we talk about projection, isn't "technology jeopardizes humanity" just another projection of guilt? Why would they think of snapping picture instead of saving people? God knows whether its an initiative or just another stage business to escape the guilt of not having guts. Why don't we just admit it and have a coffee while watching the old man die? Don't have guts anyways, instead of lying to ourselves by keeping ourselves busy with snapping pictures like we care a single bit.

Come to say about this, again... notion of Humanity is subjective

MaN of ImPosSibiliTies ~

The Wings called Never~

Once I when I was tuckoo
My world was so huge
And the sky was blue
I dreamt of what I could do

I stared into the sky
Stars were so bright
They said one day I could fly
reaching for the boundless sky

They granted me wings in pair
They said it swings in the air
Soaring through the skies we share
Conquering myriad, conquering fear

Decades flashed past
Caught in turmoil of future and past
Like a scourge, growing vast
In a homeland that never last

Their poor heart were afraid
They doubt, and they fret
They pulled me from the stage
and Raised my Wings... in a cage

Still I stare into the sky
and pondered beyond the void
Still I dream a dream that I fly
Soaring through cosmic void

Still I looked at my Wing
Stroking its feather... of Wing that never Flies

Man of Impossibilities

NEW YEAR 2014

I know this sounds like one of the topic anyone would post on writing about conventional stuffs like new year, new goal, new target, new me, be myself, blablabla... 

Everybody has a little something for themselves at the arrival of new year. Old man like me would just stay in the room and wait for the fingers to strike twelve then enjoy the volleys of firework from afar (In fact I have to wallow myself pity in the room doing works) Well a friend of mine suggested something for me to do which I think its a good idea. 

Take out a piece of paper, write down anything you will desire to achieve in 365 days, seal it in an envelope and at the end of the year check what have you done and what you have not!

But most of the people would go for the mainstream idea to go out to where vuvuzelas deafen their ears and where people get in their way to see the fireworks (happens to me most of the time) Youth they call it, perhaps the fact that they can still stand the shrieking vuvuzelas(if you ever heard of one) proves that they are young and I'm not 'nymore

p/s: If you haven't heard of the vuvuzela, there is something called google to rescue you out of the coconut from the bottom of South China Sea you're improbably trapped in ~ 

Happy New Year

Man of Impossibilities