The beeping sound woke me up and I saw my eldest son
by my side, taking care of my body dumps as I was already weak. I breathed
heavily through the tubes I found inserted into my lungs from my nostrils and
my mouth. With just a slight turn, I took a glance to my right where the Vital
signs monitor was.
“You’re getting more stable, pa.”
I felt a sudden urge to stand up. With all my might,
pulled the handle bars by the gurney, I sat up and pulled out the tubes but
before I was successful, all the nurses were summoned to my side and I had my
hands tied to the gurney.
“Pa, relax. When you are well, I’ll take you to
Pulau Langkawi, and all the places that you’ve taken us to. We’ll also go to
China to visit Alex.” Said Andy, his eyes watered.
I nodded.
I had a wife and four kids. For the last 40 years, I
had been fighting against a severe depression that has befallen on my beloved
wife. It was a tough battle, but thank god, my kids grew up completely normal
and undamaged. I believe for everything I want, there is a price to pay. For
that, I didn’t mind being hated by my wife, being thrown out of the house homeless
and have nothing at last.
Over years of roaming around, there I was, on a
gurney because of a severe pulmonary edema. I have no hard feelings on anything
to be honest, for I have raised my kids successfully no matter how tough. Thinking
of it alone makes me feel good. I mean, who could do that? Raising kids alongside
an aggressive depressed mom. If anyone would, try it *wink*. Well, My wife had
been angry with me ever since 40 years ago, but who cares, I tried to love her,
and I still do.
Finally it was already time for me to sleep, as I
heard a nurse, while putting off the light, said, “Uncle, dah masa untuk tidur
ya. (It’s time to sleep)”
I reached out to my eldest son and daughter’s hands,
held them tight on my chest. It felt good, seeing them grown up. This feeling is
something that money could never buy. Now there’s one thing that I need to
remind all these kids, “Forgive, and love your mom”
They nodded and I dozed off … Strangely, not long
after… I was pretty sure I felt the hand of my wife on my chest and heard “Ah
Tek..” (Hey, that was my name)
I woke up, feeling dizzy and just then I remembered
I slept too late the night before, completing my lesson plans and scheme of
work. Out of all nights, my brain just had to pick a night when I slept late to
give me an odd dream like this. “That was funny huh?” I told myself. It was a
warm winter in North China, and I had a strong feeling that it wouldn’t snow
this year. I showered and got ready for work. Once I stepped out … I immediately
felt the chilling sensation on my cheeks and I looked up into the grey sky. It
snowed.
As I was drowned in pleasure of the snow, my phone
beeped. I swiped it open, it was my sis sent me a picture. Opened it up, was a
heart rate monitor… a straight line…
“Wtf…” I replied
beeped…
“Dad went away
peacefully in his sleep… the last word he heard was mom saying ‘Ah Tek.. Come
home with me’”
REST IN PEACE~ YOUR SWEET MEMORY WILL ALWAYS BE IN OUR HEART AND MIND